Archive for the ‘Motherhood’ Category

Not bad, as far as a Thursday goes

October 9, 2008

Last Thursday you all got to share in the bliss of Ryan’s day ‘o tantrums.  Thankfully, this Thursday has involved bliss of another kind….happy children who play well together and a mom with enough sanity left to enjoy it.  I find myself getting so caught up in my “to-do list” most days that I think I starve my kids of some of the attention they need and deserve.  That became oh, so evident to me yesterday….

The day started off as most Wednesdays do.  I got up early so that I’d have time to shower before getting the kids up.  Ryan goes to preschool on MWF, so those mornings tend to be a little more rushed.  I had errands to run and wanted to do them after I took Ryan to school, while I was already out, which meant that I had to be extra on top of things and have everyone ready to go by 8:45, not just Ryan. 

School hasn’t been Ryan’s favorite thing of late, so mornings are filled with complaints about how much he hates school and doesn’t want to go.  The kids call him “Rainbow Boy”, thanks to a striped shirt that he wore on one of the first days that someone thought looked like a rainbow (and now I’m paranoid about sending him to school in stripes of any kind), and it seems to bother him a lot.  I, of course, take him anyway, and pray that the report from his teachers is good when I pick him up.  Lately, he hasn’t had any good reports.  I’m sure that some of his behavior is due to being teased, but he’s also just a spirited kid who gets carried away easily.  And Ryan is as forthcoming about his misbehavior as his teachers are.  He just doesn’t seem to care. 

When I picked him up yesterday, I was greeted with the lovely news that he had cut another child’s hair.  His teacher tried to downplay it, saying that it was only a tiny bit, but seriously–HE CUT SOMEONE’S HAIR!!  I don’t care if it was a huge chunk or a tiny little snip…I was NOT happy about it!

He had obviously been talked to extensively at school because as soon as we got in the car he repeated back to me all the reasons that it was a bad idea to cut someone’s hair.  He then told me that he had also shouted twice at his friends and had to sit in the “power chair”.  

Later that afternoon, I discovered that he’d been shopping in “mommy’s store” (aka, food storage), found a box of fruit snacks, and enjoyed 7 of the 10 packages in the box.  He had also broken the lamp in his room during quiet time, claiming that it just fell off the shelf and broke by itself.  Everywhere I turned, there was an infraction of some sort that left me frustrated at his lack of obedience.  And–as I’m sure all mothers know–there is little that is more aggravating than asking your child not to do something, only to have them look at you with a little gleam in their eye and do it anyway.  I felt at a loss.  I reminded myself that I have a degree in dealing with challenging behaviors; I conquered them on a daily basis when I was working–so why was I having so much trouble with my own child?  Talk about one of those moments when you wonder how Heavenly Father ever trusted you to take care of one of his children.

After a day like yesterday, I realized that I needed to get my priorities in line.  So what if my floors have crumbs on them and aren’t sparkling clean 24/7?  Will it really kill me to wait until the kids are busy doing something else before I check my email? (I’ve since turned off the alert sound so that I don’t even know when an email arrives….it will still be there later, so there’s no need to jump right up to check it).  Am I going to run out of clothes if I don’t wash the particular load that my cleaning schedule tells me needs to be done that day? 

I’ve realized, as I watch the way that Ryan gets out his frustrations, that he’s mirroring everything that I do…right down to the little “aauugghh!!” that I let loose when I feel stressed out and overwhelmed.  And, I realized that the times of stress were more frequent because I had a to-do list to get done, and rather than enjoying the time I have with my kids when they are small, I was irritated that they were making the process of getting that to-do list done a lot harder. 

After coming to those realizations yesterday, I had a heart-to-heart with myself.  I’ve set some goals that will bring greater rewards than having a perfectly spotless and put together house.  Ryan and I made a deal that if he shouts, I get to tickle him….and if mommy shouts, he gets to tickle me.  We spent an hour outside together, playing and getting some energy out.  We sat on the couch and read books together.  Boy, what a difference those few little things have made in the last 24 hours.  I know we’ll still have rough days from time to time, but I don’t want to look back and wish that I’d spent less time cleaning (or any other of a long list of distractions) and more time with my kiddos.   They deserve more than that. 

So, my new motto is BALANCE.  I’ll still have time to clean my house and check my facebook page…it will just be during the hours of 2-4, when the kids are napping.  I can still catch up on episodes of “Say Yes to the Dress”….it will just be after everyone has gone to bed.  I’ve let myself indulge in too much leisure and far too little bonding with my kids, and it’s time for a change!

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Well, how about that.  I started this post to record the fact that Ryan cut another child’s hair at school, and look what it’s turned into….aren’t you glad that I don’t let myself get carried away with my thoughts on here very often?

I have a new job!!

July 1, 2008

I’m a referree! The pay stinks, but the warm fuzzies you get when you see the players sleeping at night make it all worth it in the end. 
 

I love how, when all is said and done, Owen didn’t want the toy anyway 🙄 .

Maybe when my kids learn to get along I’ll have more time to blog…

Wow–I survived!

April 10, 2008

Joseph had a dentist appointment this morning, so he took the first half the day off.  I had some errands to run down in his neck of the woods, so I decided to make a day of it and get it all done in one shot.  I dropped Joseph off at work just before 1:00 and then headed over the South Towne Expo for a consignment sale.  *First unload and load of three kids and a monstrous stroller*.  After that, I headed to Provo to make a little drop-off. *Second unload and load of three kids and a monstrous stroller*. Then we headed over to the Provo Library to see if we could visit Aunt Carla. *Third unload and load of three kids and a monstrous stroller*. She was in a meeting, so instead we just hung out in the children’s section for a while reading books(sorry we missed you Carla!). Then we headed to the mall to kill some time. *Fourth unload and load of three kids and a monstrous stroller*. The kids were all REALLY good during all of this, so we shared a pretzel in the food court and then headed back to the car. We still had some time on our hands, so we headed up to Aunti Em’s school, hoping to catch her still working the classroom–luckily she was there. *Fifth unload and load of three kids, minus the monstrous stroller*. The babies had been either in their carseats or the stroller all day long, so they were loving the freedom of being able to crawl all over the place. Ryan had a great time playing school and I fear that we left things in a bigger mess than we should have. But, it was a fun little visit. I was prepared for a pretty crazy day, but it went far better than I expected. I didn’t need any of the extra clothes I packed, and there wasn’t any excessive whining or crying.  I thought they day of getting out for extended trips by myself with all three kids would never come, but if it’s this easy every time, I just might try it again!

Oh, to be on a plane to Hawaii….

March 13, 2008

I’m exhausted today.  I could really use some R&R in a place far away…..like Hawaii.  Or China.  Doesn’t really matter, as long as it’s far away.  I had great plans to get out of the house and run some much needed errands, but it didn’t happen.  First, we had a new garage door installed, so I had to be home for a few hours while that was done.  Then, it was raining.  Who wants to take three kids out into the rain?  Not me.   Owen was his usual cranky self today, and he must have passed his secret across the nursery to Emmy this morning:  “Psst!  Hey….I know which of mom’s buttons to push today….wanna help?”.  Apparently she fell for it, because they’ve both really been on one today.  Ryan’s been relatively good, but once he gets wound up, it’s hard to reign him back in.  We’ve got half of the living room blocked off due to the fireplace mess, and the kids are just tired of having such a small space to play in…..and I’m tired of listening to them whine about it.  Joseph has to go out with the missionaries tonight, so I don’t even get any help when he gets home.  Thank goodness it’s Friday (that’s what we call Thursdays around here because Joseph doesn’t work on Fridays)….it if were Monday, I’d definately be out of here!